The Better Days

It won’t be like this always. There will be better days.
(“Always” Jessica Reedy, From the Heart)

These song lyrics have been a source of so much hope for me. When I first heard them my heart melted. I was tired, hurt, resentful, etc. and was so frustrated with my circumstances. I was sick and spent a lot of time alone. The song was a reminder that our circumstances really are temporary. I realized I had already had better days and surely better days would come again.

Continue reading “The Better Days”

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You have the power

For me, surviving has been an ongoing process that involves choice, honesty, hope and a support system. With every step of being a survivor, I accrue more strength and determination. I’d like to remind you that we have so much power and influence over the type of life we live. Continue reading “You have the power”

Relationships 100

I want to talk about relationships. Yes, that subject. Everybody is talking, asking questions and giving advise. I want to do something similar but I want to speak to your heart. Will you let me? There are some things I feel compelled to tell you.

Relationships matter. They get a little complicated and complex but they are important. Whether they be a romantic, familial or friend-based relationship, they serve an important purpose in our lives. It’s crucial that they’re healthy ones. I have had my share of healthy and unhealthy relationships. I have allowed them too little, and at times, too much importance in my life. I have been blessed and I have been abused by those relationships. I’ve made good choices and I’ve made bad choices. All in all, I have learned how to be a better person. I have also learned to require more from other people.

What are your relationship dynamics like? Do you add to others’ quality of life? Are your relationships based on neediness and what you can get from one another or love, mutual concern and respect? Relationships are tools to help us build, they are not catch-all closets that we dump junk and excess into. Relationships, although challenging sometimes, are designed to make life more fulfilling. A healthy relationship allows opportunity for elevation – not degradation.

How do you know if a relationship is healthy or not? Personally, I like to focus on its effect on my life, on my psyche, on my confidence and its effect on who I am as a person overall. If a relationship is making me uncomfortable, unhappy or makes me feel less of a person then it is not healthy and it is not for me. If the relationship threatens or smothers my individuality then it’s an unhealthy one. If I have to question who I am, it’s a wrap! Consider this: If you cry more than you laugh, there’s a problem. If you fight more than you enjoy their company, then it’s time to walk away. I think you get it. Allow your heart and logic to work together – they will tell you the truth. They will tell you if your life has become more or less than.

Never trade happiness and peace of mind for a relationship, emotional or sexual stimulation, and temporary pacifiers. You are worth more than meaningless relations. You deserve friendship, support, love, loyalty, respect and a sense of family. Never forget it. Take time to evaluate your life and your relationships. You won’t be disappointed.

I’m rooting for you and hoping you’ll root for me, too.

Missy